The Growing Together Village

Take it Slow

Learning and Change is open ended and slow.

Creating positive change within deep layers of ourselves requires time and deep contemplation. Whilst the busy pace of the world means we sometimes need to adapt quickly, or find solutions in the immediacy of a situation, a deep slower reflective process gives longer term benefits when addressing issues such as identity, embedded patterns of behaviours and beliefs.
 

When moving or thinking quickly, we are often drawing on the existing framework of ourselves. We are reinforcing who we already are.

To find change and movement, a slow reflective thinking and communicating process allows for deeper layers of the self to be known and for new possibilities to arise.

Having time to listen to others and then reflect whilst simultaneously seeing these issues play out within our day to day lives gives opportunity to step outside the echo chamber of our own minds.

 

Structured Communication
Some of the conversations will be facilitated by me and have a set structure to them.

Having topics and a set ‘shape’ to some of our discussions gives a scaffold on which to think deeply about an aspect of self of the world.

Having clear guidelines about what and how we are talking about something makes a clear social contract in which we can feel steady enough to challenge ourselves and our ideas whilst holding or sharing the inevitable vulnerability that comes along with this kind of challenge.

 

Spontaneous Communication
Some of the conversations will be self led and spontaneous

The nature of this kind of community is that it requires a degree of relationship between its members. These can be at all different levels of closeness and fondness, but at least some sense of relationship with others means we feel more able to speak openly and freely about ourselves and our circumstances.
Relationships need not only deep moments of interaction but also spontaneous and lighter moments of interaction. Whether it be chatting online, or at in person events, creating a sense of belonging to the group as a whole will support the deeper work we do elsewhere.

 

 Closed Group

In order to help this space feel safe enough to speak and explore the topics of conversation, this group will be run in a closed manner. 

There will be specific times where the membership opens for new joiners (perhaps for two weeks, or for a set number of new participants) and then the membership will close again. Once you are a member, you can stay for as long as you want.


This means each current group can settle into the culture of the group and we can undertake the work together, knowing that there aren't new unknown people joining at random moments throughout our discussions.



Individual Participation
People join individually. That means each person who joins has actively chosen to be here in their own right. In the discussion groups we talk about ourselves. If both people within  a couple join, you speak about yourselves, not about each other.

As each of us arrives at parenting with our individual histories, personalities and circumstances, we enter into reflection and discussion from our own perspectives. We grow and evolve on our own terms and within our own capabilities.

Couples will of course probably talk and reflect on these things together and the way they play out within their relationships, but the membership space is based on individuals, not couples.

If you’re in a couple and your partner/wife/husband is not part of the membership, you can  of course talk about your experience and thoughts on being in the group, but I ask that you do not show content such as videos or discussions where others are speaking about themselves with non members. If your partner/wife/husband wants to view these things, they need to join the membership. This is to hold confidentiality and respect to both me and the other members of the group.

This also means that the membership as a whole can trust that they are only sharing information, thoughts and vulnerability with others who have also actively signed up to do the same. We all stand alongside each other as we explore together.

(If two members of a couple wish to both join, the second membership will incur a discount)